May I Offer You a Hot Beverage?

Two weeks ago, my class had Cooking Week. During this time, we discussed our favorite foods and I taught the class about 20 food and cooking related terms. The highlights of the week, however, were when my class made and ate some Western style food.

For Cooking Week, I picked two simple foods – cereal and smoothies. My kids are young and we are cooking in our classroom, not an actual kitchen. So, we needed things that are easy and kid-friendly. This is why I went with cereal and smoothies. These foods do not need any cooking, kids like them, and they are quick. Plus, the necessary ingredients are widely available in China.

For the most part, our cooking activities went smoothly. The kids really enjoyed it. I did notice that a few kids weren’t really eating their cereal. When I asked why, they said it was too cold. My co-teacher then said “I forgot about that. We should have warmed up the milk.” I reminded her that the kids were eating Cheerios and bananas on a hot day so, the milk could be cold.

The next day, we made smoothies. Making smoothies is usually simple but, this involved some negotiation. First, we had to hide the smoothies from the school doctor. She believes that milk and fruit are dangerous together. Once that was taken care of, I had to convince the director that the smoothies really did need to be cold. I wasn’t going to use ice in our smoothies because the tap water here isn’t safe to drink. I didn’t want the kitchen to not realize we were going to be ingesting the ice and accidentally make it with tap water. So, I decided to freeze the bananas for 24 hours.

Freezing the bananas was a controversial decision. Everyone believed the smoothies would be too cold and make the children sick. In fact, the director even brought the milk and frozen bananas to my classroom about two hours prior to our cooking time so everything could “warm up.”

When I planned my Cooking Week activities, I made a crucial mistake. I overlooked Chinese people’s aversion to cold drinks. They really don’t like them. In restaurants, I have to specify that I want cold water or the waiter will bring me a teapot full of almost boiling water.

From what I’ve gathered, there are a few different theories as to why Chinese people really prefer hot beverages to cold beverages:

- As I previously mentioned, the tap water is unsafe to drink and has always been. So, maybe the hot water was seen as safer and cleaner.

- Some people believe that drinking a cold drink while eating will cause your body to spend energy warming up the drink, thus leaving the body without enough energy for digestion.

- There is an idea floating around that drinking cold things will cause the fat in your food to solidify and clog up your insides.

- According to Traditional Chinese Medicine, cold water disrupts the body’s balance.

Now, I’ve been to other countries with unsafe drink water (ex. Colombia) and the people there did not drink hot water. They just boiled their water and then put it in the refrigerator to chill. Or, they drank bottled water. So, I’m not completely convinced about this theory.

I really can’t say exactly why Chinese people prefer hot water. I’ve asked a few and all they could tell me was “It’s healthier this way,” or “Cold water gives me a stomachache. “ However, with summer here, I wish I knew.

Sheldon and the Chinese have something in common!

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Photo: http://theprovisionroom.com/2013/06/26/what-shall-i-bring/

Supermarket Scuffle

Living abroad forces a person to reevaluate their expectations and standards. What was once commonplace becomes rare and exciting. Conversely, what was once unthinkable can become common. China has certainly done this for me.

In my neighborhood, there is a grocery store called Wu Mart. It looks like a knockoff of Wal-Mart, albeit a darker, dingier knockoff. However, as a whole, it’s fine. It has meat, vegetables, fruit, milk, eggs, bread, etc.  It doesn’t have a lot of stuff I like but, hey, it’s China. Why would they? Anyway, I used to go to the grocery store and expect to find everything in one trip. Now, I go to the grocery store and expect to see a fight. Going to Wu-Mart is like going to a boxing match.

I don’t know what it is about Wu Mart that makes people violent. But, it does. During my nine months in China, I have seen several fist fights at Wu Mart. I’ve also seen dozens of screaming matches. Yesterday, I saw a crazy woman clutching a stranger’s leg, while sitting on the ground and sobbing. The police had to remove the woman to get her off of the random man.

I’ve thought long and hard about why Wu Mart makes people so angry. I can’t tell why. I’ve even observed a few fights to try and see what set the people off. I usually can’t tell because I don’t understand the language. Wu Mart doesn’t make me angry but, maybe it’s under some power lines or over a magnetic field that affects some people. I just don’t know what it is. Whatever it is, grocery shopping at Wu Mart is always an adventure.

I've got to train like Rocky...

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...to shop at Wu Mart!

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Rocky Photo Credit: http://billcoyne.net/cardio-alternatives/

Wu Mart Photo Credit: http://barfblog.com/tags/wu-mart/

Calendar Magic

Today is Monday. Typically, this means that yesterday was Sunday. In China, however, this was not the case. In China, yesterday was Friday. Well, it was for work purposes at least. The Chinese are magicians when it comes to the calendar. They can change the days and the overall order of the days like magic.

The reason yesterday was a work Friday is May Day aka Labor Day. May Day was on Thursday, May 1st. To give people a little holiday break, work and school were canceled on Friday. Saturday was a regular weekend day. Anyway, to make up for Friday being off, Sunday became a work/ school day for most people. So, we had a three day weekend, which will be followed by a six day week.

The Chinese refer to these special, working weekend days as Makeup Days. Personally, I would rather just work the regular days and keep my weekends off. But, I guess this takes away the magical way Chinese people have with the calendar. Oh well.

Happy Labor Day! Yeah, I'm going to need you to come in on Sunday.

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Dog Whisperer

If Cesar Millan had been born in China, no one would have ever heard of him. Why? Because Chinese people are awesome at training their dogs to behave properly. There is no need for the Dog Whisperer here. Every Chinese person appears to have his exact same set of skills innately.

On my walk home from work, I often pass an old man with his pet Chow. I’ll call them Old Man and Chow because I don’t know their actual names. Anyway, Old Man never puts Chow on a leash. He just carries this big, bamboo looking stick which he uses to tap the ground to give Chow commands. I don’t know the code but, it seems like Chow never disobeys.

I’ve seen other Chinese people do similar things with their dogs. Older men seem to favor the stick and tap method. Another method involves the use of hand signals to give commands todogs. I’ve also seen people use sounds, like whistles, to give commands.

Dogs are really popular pets in China. Many of my neighbors have dogs of all sizes and breeds. Almost every single one of their dogs is well behaved and obedient, even without the use of a leash. I have no how idea Chinese people accomplish this but, they do. It’s a good thing Cesar Millan is in the US because, in China, he’d be unemployed.

Chow looks just like this. I'd pet him if his breed didn't have a violent reputation. 

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Photo Credit: http://www.chowchowpups.be/

The Long Con

This year, teaching has been completely different than it was before. This is because my students started the year not speaking a word of English. I’ve never had this before. Even when I taught kindergarten last year in Korea, my entire class could speak English. In fact, 10 of the 12 could read too.

Not having a common language with my class can be difficult. I have a bilingual co-teacher who bridges the gap between me, the students, and the other teachers. However, she can’t be everywhere, all of the time.

Recently, the kids decided to teach me to speak Chinese. They’ve taught me to count, to say hello, and a few short phrases. This is actually pretty useful. Not only do I learn some Chinese but, it is a bonding activity for us. The kids get to feel useful and they see that learning a new language is work for everyone, not just them.

So, when a few boys started teaching me a new word, I didn’t think anything of it. I tried to say the word properly and in the correct tone. However, every time I made an attempt, the boys giggled like mad. This continued for a few days.

I asked the boys what the word meant. No one would say. I thought the word was someone’s Chinese name. It sounded something like “bean-to” or “bean-yo,” depending on which child said it. Anyway, my pronunciation of the word made the kids laugh every single time.

After a few days, the boys and I were still practicing. They could tell that I was really working hard to say the word properly. I also kept asking what the word meant. One boy, Daren, finally took pity on me. Daren said “Bean-yo means…” and then he looked around for a moment, confused. Then, Daren stuck his finger up his nose and took out a big wad of snot. He then looked at me, smiled and triumphantly announced “Bean-you means this!” while waving his snot at me.

Yes, I’d been diligently practicing the word for snot for almost a week. All I can say is well played boys, well played. 

Maybe I should teach the boys to introduce themselves as I.P. Freely. 

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Photo: http://yourhometeamsucks.com/2014/03/11/the-best-prank-call-of-all-time/

The Bread Basket

Growing up, my family occasionally visited Chinese restaurants. I liked the food. As I got older, I realized that Chinese food in American has been Americanized. So, when I came to Chinese, I knew not to expect to see any sweet and sour chicken or mu shu pork. I did not, however, expect to see any bread.

China, it turns out, has a lot of bread. Of course, there is the Western, imported stuff. But, there is also Chinese bread. In northern China, wheat, not rice, is grown. So, this part of China has bread and noodles. I never expected this.

A lot of the bread is different than what I’m used to. For starters, the bread is often steamed instead of baked. Also, there are several types of flatbread. Everything, though, has been good.

So, if you’re ever in China, remember to pass the bread basket!

Mantou

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Deep Fried Mantou served with Condensed Milk Dipping Sauce -Yummy Dessert

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Baozi (Pronounced bowza) - This comes with a variety of fillings. 

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Cong You Bing - An example of Chinese flatbread

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For the Dead Homies

Today is Tomb Sweeping Day in China. It’s pretty much what the name implies: people go to the graves of their ancestors and do various types of maintenance work. From what I read online, pulling weeds, washing headstones, and repainting the characters on headstones seem to be the main chores people perform.

Tomb Sweeping Day is an old holiday. However, it was banned during much of recent history. From 1949 to 2008, Tomb Sweeping Day was outlawed. It’s back now and it’s a public holiday.

One aspect of Tomb Sweeping Day that I find unusual is the burning of paper items. Traditional Chinese beliefs on the afterlife dictate that the dead need stuff. So, people burned things that their departed loved ones might need later. In modern times, people burn paper replicas of these items. Common items to burn are spirit money (fake money specifically made for this purpose) and paper cars. People, however, can find a paper replica of just about anything to burn. I’ve even heard of paper mistresses and paper KTVs (karaoke bars) burned.

In addition to maintaining graves and burning money, there are other ancestral rites that people can perform. Some people bring food and drinks to graves and present them to their ancestors. After a certain amount of time (maybe 30 minutes) the descendants eat the food and drink the drinks. People also kowtow at the ancestors’ graves or at pictures of their ancestors.

People don’t have to participate in Tomb Sweeping Day. My co-worker told me that she will not be going to the cemetery because Beijing isn’t her family’s hometown. Therefore, she has no local graves to maintain. In lieu of a cemetery visit, she will do something outdoors to mark the beginning of spring.  This is actually a common practice. This morning, I saw several children flying kites and many elderly ladies dancing. They were all doing something to commemorate the beginning of spring.

Tomb Sweeping Day is not a holiday that I see myself ever participating in. However, it’s certainly an interesting idea.  

Burning paper iPhone 5s is the hot trend for Tomb Sweeping Day 2014.

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Photo Credit: http://www.thebeijinger.com/blog/2013/04/03/insider-s-guide-burning-your-iphone