Dog Whisperer

If Cesar Millan had been born in China, no one would have ever heard of him. Why? Because Chinese people are awesome at training their dogs to behave properly. There is no need for the Dog Whisperer here. Every Chinese person appears to have his exact same set of skills innately.

On my walk home from work, I often pass an old man with his pet Chow. I’ll call them Old Man and Chow because I don’t know their actual names. Anyway, Old Man never puts Chow on a leash. He just carries this big, bamboo looking stick which he uses to tap the ground to give Chow commands. I don’t know the code but, it seems like Chow never disobeys.

I’ve seen other Chinese people do similar things with their dogs. Older men seem to favor the stick and tap method. Another method involves the use of hand signals to give commands todogs. I’ve also seen people use sounds, like whistles, to give commands.

Dogs are really popular pets in China. Many of my neighbors have dogs of all sizes and breeds. Almost every single one of their dogs is well behaved and obedient, even without the use of a leash. I have no how idea Chinese people accomplish this but, they do. It’s a good thing Cesar Millan is in the US because, in China, he’d be unemployed.

Chow looks just like this. I'd pet him if his breed didn't have a violent reputation. 

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Photo Credit: http://www.chowchowpups.be/

The Long Con

This year, teaching has been completely different than it was before. This is because my students started the year not speaking a word of English. I’ve never had this before. Even when I taught kindergarten last year in Korea, my entire class could speak English. In fact, 10 of the 12 could read too.

Not having a common language with my class can be difficult. I have a bilingual co-teacher who bridges the gap between me, the students, and the other teachers. However, she can’t be everywhere, all of the time.

Recently, the kids decided to teach me to speak Chinese. They’ve taught me to count, to say hello, and a few short phrases. This is actually pretty useful. Not only do I learn some Chinese but, it is a bonding activity for us. The kids get to feel useful and they see that learning a new language is work for everyone, not just them.

So, when a few boys started teaching me a new word, I didn’t think anything of it. I tried to say the word properly and in the correct tone. However, every time I made an attempt, the boys giggled like mad. This continued for a few days.

I asked the boys what the word meant. No one would say. I thought the word was someone’s Chinese name. It sounded something like “bean-to” or “bean-yo,” depending on which child said it. Anyway, my pronunciation of the word made the kids laugh every single time.

After a few days, the boys and I were still practicing. They could tell that I was really working hard to say the word properly. I also kept asking what the word meant. One boy, Daren, finally took pity on me. Daren said “Bean-yo means…” and then he looked around for a moment, confused. Then, Daren stuck his finger up his nose and took out a big wad of snot. He then looked at me, smiled and triumphantly announced “Bean-you means this!” while waving his snot at me.

Yes, I’d been diligently practicing the word for snot for almost a week. All I can say is well played boys, well played. 

Maybe I should teach the boys to introduce themselves as I.P. Freely. 

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Photo: http://yourhometeamsucks.com/2014/03/11/the-best-prank-call-of-all-time/

The Bread Basket

Growing up, my family occasionally visited Chinese restaurants. I liked the food. As I got older, I realized that Chinese food in American has been Americanized. So, when I came to Chinese, I knew not to expect to see any sweet and sour chicken or mu shu pork. I did not, however, expect to see any bread.

China, it turns out, has a lot of bread. Of course, there is the Western, imported stuff. But, there is also Chinese bread. In northern China, wheat, not rice, is grown. So, this part of China has bread and noodles. I never expected this.

A lot of the bread is different than what I’m used to. For starters, the bread is often steamed instead of baked. Also, there are several types of flatbread. Everything, though, has been good.

So, if you’re ever in China, remember to pass the bread basket!

Mantou

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Deep Fried Mantou served with Condensed Milk Dipping Sauce -Yummy Dessert

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Baozi (Pronounced bowza) - This comes with a variety of fillings. 

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Cong You Bing - An example of Chinese flatbread

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For the Dead Homies

Today is Tomb Sweeping Day in China. It’s pretty much what the name implies: people go to the graves of their ancestors and do various types of maintenance work. From what I read online, pulling weeds, washing headstones, and repainting the characters on headstones seem to be the main chores people perform.

Tomb Sweeping Day is an old holiday. However, it was banned during much of recent history. From 1949 to 2008, Tomb Sweeping Day was outlawed. It’s back now and it’s a public holiday.

One aspect of Tomb Sweeping Day that I find unusual is the burning of paper items. Traditional Chinese beliefs on the afterlife dictate that the dead need stuff. So, people burned things that their departed loved ones might need later. In modern times, people burn paper replicas of these items. Common items to burn are spirit money (fake money specifically made for this purpose) and paper cars. People, however, can find a paper replica of just about anything to burn. I’ve even heard of paper mistresses and paper KTVs (karaoke bars) burned.

In addition to maintaining graves and burning money, there are other ancestral rites that people can perform. Some people bring food and drinks to graves and present them to their ancestors. After a certain amount of time (maybe 30 minutes) the descendants eat the food and drink the drinks. People also kowtow at the ancestors’ graves or at pictures of their ancestors.

People don’t have to participate in Tomb Sweeping Day. My co-worker told me that she will not be going to the cemetery because Beijing isn’t her family’s hometown. Therefore, she has no local graves to maintain. In lieu of a cemetery visit, she will do something outdoors to mark the beginning of spring.  This is actually a common practice. This morning, I saw several children flying kites and many elderly ladies dancing. They were all doing something to commemorate the beginning of spring.

Tomb Sweeping Day is not a holiday that I see myself ever participating in. However, it’s certainly an interesting idea.  

Burning paper iPhone 5s is the hot trend for Tomb Sweeping Day 2014.

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Photo Credit: http://www.thebeijinger.com/blog/2013/04/03/insider-s-guide-burning-your-iphone